The Best Drinking Quotes & Hilarious Taglines to Toast To

Raise a Glass & a Laugh: The Ultimate Drinking Quote Collection

Few things in life bring people together quite like a good drink and a great laugh. Whether you're toasting with beer, sipping on wine, or enjoying a well-crafted cocktail, there's no shortage of wisdom (and comedy) when it comes to alcohol. From legendary figures to modern-day comedians, some of the best lines in history have been inspired by a strong pour.

In this collection, we’re serving up the best drinking quotes from famous minds—and adding our own hilarious, t-shirt-worthy taglines that might just make you spit out your beer laughing.

Famous Drinking Quotes Worth Raising a Glass To

Beer Wisdom & Brewed Truths

• "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." — Benjamin Franklin
• "Beer, it’s the best damn drink in the world." — Jack Nicholson
• "I work until beer o’clock." — Stephen King
• "Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer." — Arnold Schwarzenegger
• "One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor." — George Carlin
• "Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough." — Mark Twain

Wine-Infused Wisdom

• "Wine is sunlight, held together by water." — Galileo
• "I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food." — W.C. Fields
• "There comes a time in every woman’s life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne." — Bette Davis
• "In wine, there is truth." — Pliny the Elder
• "Wine makes daily living easier, less hurried, with fewer tensions and more tolerance." — Benjamin Franklin

Cocktail & Hard Liquor Laughs

• "I drink to make other people more interesting." — Ernest Hemingway
• "Shaken, not stirred." — James Bond, Goldfinger
• "Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy." — Frank Sinatra
• "Here’s to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life." — F. Scott Fitzgerald
• "I feel bad for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day." — Dean Martin
• "Vodka may not be the answer, but it’s worth a shot." — Unknown

New & Original Drinking Taglines for the True Booze Enthusiasts

Not every legendary drinking quote has been spoken yet—so we’re stepping in to fix that. These brand-new, t-shirt-worthy drinking phrases are perfect for beer lovers, wine enthusiasts, and anyone who enjoys a little humor with their drink.

Beer Lovers Unite!

• “If beer is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.”
• “Brew more, worry less.”
• “IPA Lot When I Drink.”
• “Beer: Because adulting is hard.”
• "Work hard, drink harder."
• "Lager than life."
• "Suds before duds."
• "Beer: the only six-pack I care about."
• For the Winos Who Know
• "Wine flies when you're having fun."
• "Sip happens."
• "Raising standards, one bottle at a time."
• "Wine: because no great story started with a salad."
• "You had me at Merlot."
• "I make pour decisions."
• "Rosé all day, regret nothing."
• "My relationship status: in a committed relationship with wine."

Spirited Sayings & Cocktail Chaos

• "Whiskey me away."
• "Tequila: Making bad decisions since forever."
• "The margarita made me do it."
• "Vodka: because sometimes water just isn’t enough."
• "Gin and bear it."
• "Old fashioned? I prefer my drinks that way."
• "Rum: the reason pirates had so much fun."

Final Toast: Because Drinking Is Better With Humor

Whether you’re here for a witty Instagram caption, a drinking quote to impress your friends, or just looking for a good laugh, one thing’s for sure—alcohol and humor are a match made in barroom heaven.

Raise a glass to the wisdom of history’s greatest drinkers and the future of funny drinking taglines. And if you’re looking for the perfect way to wear your passion for beer and wine, you might just find something you love in our Beer Strong collection.

Cheers to good drinks, great laughs, and even better stories!